The Search

I don't mean to be critical, but I am so sick of this type of commentary:
http://social.richmond.com/blog/carolinesplate/2009/04/the-lost-first-date/

Yes, dating in 2009 is different than dating in 1950. Yes, it sucks.

Now move on.

I find this obsession with "the search for the perfect mate" extremely tiresome. There is no perfect mate.

If you're lucky, you will find a kind, supportive, loving mate ... but there is no point in hoping for perfection. And there is no point in wasting energy analyzing why near-perfection is so hard to find.

Why not use that energy to pursue something within reach? Why not search for yourself ... connect with yourself ... improve yourself.

Each one of us is ultimately responsible for our own happiness. No one--not even the "perfect" mate-- can guarantee another person's sense of well being. That sense is one that comes from within.

So ... to all you self-professed dating gurus, I say relax. Take a break from dating as a competitive sport, and cultivate a relationship with someone who can make you happy--yourself.